One % of the world population suffers from stuttering as per the available figures. However, various stages of stuttering have been revealed. The topic that we are going to discuss today is whether stuttering is curable or the victim has to live throughout the life with the speech problem.
To understand the answer for this question, it is necessary to find out what is the cause, of stuttering. Stuttering can happen due to various reasons. It has been observed that 50% of the cases stuttering are hereditary. Besides, there could be medical reasons which we will not talk about as it is beyond the scope of this discussion. Only qualified doctor will be able to comment on that.
What we are talking about is when there is no medical problem but still people stutter. It is necessary to understand how the words are formed and how the voice is created. The voice is created by the process of holding the breath in the lungs and releasing it through vocal cord. It produces sound not the words. The words are created by the speech organs. There are five speech organs which are; jaw, tongue, teeth, lips and palate. These organs are responsible for creating clear words. And, for bringing about efficacy of your speech. Clarity is critical. There is breath in the lungs and some breath is released when we want to speak. This breath strikes the vocal cord which is like a rubber membrane. The moment it strikes there is vibration and sound is produced but it is only sound. The words are created by the speech organs as I have said above.
These five speech organs work in tandem and words can be created only by using the organs. Furthermore if there is no breath, there can be no speech. In the normal speech, coordination between the mind and the release of breath and the movement by the speech organs are required. But mind thinks 10 times faster than the speech. This is the major problem. Whenever we have to make a speech in front of an audience we tend to forget what we wanted to speak. The person who stutters is in a hurry to say what he has prepared lest he forgets what they had prepared.
The fact is that it is very difficult to speak the way you have prepared. It is said that there are three types of speeches. This is true. One speech that we prepare to deliver. Second is the speech that we would have delivered. Third is the speech that we like to have delivered. But perfect coordination between the mind and the speech works better and controls and the release of breath by the lungs. Speech can therefore be best made when we ensure that there is perfect coordination between the mind that that is the thinking power and the breath in the lungs. It is observed that whenever you are not speaking clearly because of any of your problems, you need to relax and reassure yourself that you will not be in a hurry. You should start habit of thinking and speaking. When you think and speak chances are that you will be able to say what you want to say without stuttering. But it’s a tedious process. You have to continue this practice all the time. Habits die very hard. But you don’t have to forget. If you do, the old habit returns. You have just to accept that you are trying to do something which is difficult. It is bound to take time and effort. Perseverance is something that will come to your rescue.
When we think of the famous people who stuttered, the first name that to mind is that of King George VI, father of present Queen Elizabeth. There is a movie named the ‘King’s Speech’. It depicts not only the effort of the king but also that of the trainer who ensured that there is marked improvement and the King is the able to broadcast the speech. Speech was mandatory in the turbulent times of war with Hitler. Anyone who is having some interest in the subject must watch the movie. It’s also available on YouTube.
When we talk of other famous personalities who stuttered there are many. Marlin Munroe and Julia Roberts are the famous actors. Winston Churchill also stuttered. Tiger Woods does and so does Joe Biden.
In our country the two names which come before us are that of Hrithik Roshan famous actor and his uncle Roshan, the music director. EMS Namboouripad ex- Kerala Chief Minister was another famous personality with the problem. While there is no doubt that complete cure of stuttering is not claimed by any of the speech therapist, some improvement can definitely be achieved, with the continued practice and efforts.
If we go through the example of the King George the VI, it is depicted in the movie referred above; we find that more than a qualified speech therapist the trainer, the dedicated speech trainer may be in a better position to help. Its replacing the fallacious speech habits with those which will work. One may find the course of Voice Culture training of great advantage. It’s so not only for the people who stutter but also for those who want to speak impeccable language.
Such policies are nothing less than hidden attempt to reject most claims. Many policy conditions are written in such ambiguous fashion that the TPA and/or Insurance companies can reject any claim at their will and discretion. Before signing for any policy, one needs to go through and understand all conditions laid down in the policy/prospectus. Unfortunately, these conditions of the policies are written in such a language that these can be turned and twisted by the TPA/ Insurance Companies. If someone requests them to send a ‘rejection letter’ , for that also TPA insists that all their procedures must be completed.
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- Respect is a key element for creating a good bond between people, whether it is family, friends, work zone or any other surrounding.
- One of the best ways to respect is to listen. Listen to what the person is trying to say. First listen, then understand, then say something if you have something to say. Listen to understand, not to reply. Sometimes, you may not understand what that person is trying to say or express. But respecting them by listening to their words might be excellent for them. It may not be anything to you, but for them it could be everything.
- We owe respect and give love. If someone has done something nice to us, then we owe them respect. We need to thanks them. But love is without expectation.
- If you have done something good, then you need not beg for respect and compromise your dignity. Remember, respect is for those who deserve it, not those who demand it.
- Show respect to people who don’t deserve it, not as their character’s reflection but of yours. Show them how you treat them.
- Sometimes, the way people treat you is your own reflection. They just show us the mirror. So, treat them the way you want them to treat you. It’s a give and take business. Give respect earn respect.
- But, is respecting others the only thing? The answer is – NO. While respecting others, you have to create respect for yourself. First respect yourself. The person who doesn’t respect himself can’t expect respect from others. The famous scientist Albert Einstein has once said, “Everyone should be respected as an individual, but no one idolized.”
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A soap opera telecasted on a South Korean TV channel called “Jealous Incarnate” depicts that jealousy is a part and parcel of human personality. Yes, jealousy is interconnected with the human emotions, thoughts and feelings and it occurs due to insecurity, fear, concern, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of status or something of great personal value, particularly in reference to a human connection. In short, the resentment against rival success is called jealousy.
Many people fall prey to this negative emotion. A recent study shows that insecurity and inferiority complex is the main aspect behind jealousy. And person who suffers with these feelings tends to have jealousy.
Jealousy has two faces. The first face is that you are jealous of somebody and the second face is that you are getting disturbed just because someone else is jealous of you. In both the cases, analysis of the problem is required. Let’s now witness the opinions stated by certain individuals regarding jealousy.
Quotes on jealousy
As expressed by some individuals “ Jealousy indicates the lack of self-confidence in oneself”. As it is already stated above “It is a kind of hatred built upon insecurity”. “When you develop a hatred for a person, then they possess something which you are in need of. If a person hates you then you possess something which they are in need of” is a definition given by another set of individuals for jealousy.
There’s another saying which goes like this “Never hate a person who is jealous of you instead respect their jealousy towards you because they are the ones who consider you better than themselves”. But it isn’t quite agreeable that one should respect the jealousy shown on them because out of jealousy the person can execute something that is harmful. Therefore you need to have an eye on your interest.
There was a movie last back in 70’s titled “Blow Hot Blow Cold”. The story isn’t important but the climax matters. The climax was set in an idyllic natural background in which there were 2 couples. One couple was young and the other one was middle aged. The young couple were passionately making love and at that point of time the middle aged man is shown to be extremely jealous. And in the climax the middle aged man kills the young man due to jealousy. Hence, jealousy can go to the extent of committing a crime. Therefore, we cannot afford to forgive or forget the people who are jealous and it is advisable to be cautious about them.
Some people say “I don’t give people a reason to hate me, but they create their own drama out of jealousy”. This is absolutely true. Even though you aren’t in a need to attract the jealousy of the people around you, still there are people jealous of you. There is a low-key comment given by individuals on jealousy “Never flaunt anything. You are giving a reason for others to get jealousy.”
As it is explained above we cannot respect the person who is jealous and we have to be watchful over them. Likewise, it isn’t logical how a person can be unhappy and unsatisfied in their life that they have to illustrate a drama just to get noticed among the crowd. Yes, it’s very true that many people are unhappy in their life and it’s due to various reasons. Consequently, they find out an exhaust. They vent out there bottled-up feelings and suffer from jealousy.
The next set of individuals, are those who were close to you once upon a time have now become just invert strangers. For example, there are two friends. Whereas one becomes rich and feels below his dignity to approach his poor friend and acts like he doesn’t recognize him. And even if they pass on the same ground and face each other, they will pose as though they haven’t met each other in their
lifetime. This is so true and everybody would have come across this situation atlaest once in a lifetime.
Another group of people are the people who are intimidated by you. Hence they start badmouthing about you with an expectation that others don’t find you appealing. Yes, they don’t wish the other people or the common friends, associates or relatives to like you. So, therefore they badmouth you in whatever way possible.
Jealousy is indeed the worst characteristic in any person but the fact is that every human at one point of time experience jealousy. Jealousy may create problems or conflicts for the people on whom they are jealous with. You may not be jealous of others but on the other side you shouldn’t show magnanimity simply to please others so that they don’t create any harm to you. Instead you need to
find your own ways to guard yourself and be cautious.
Jealousy is a disease. If it has infected you, then get well soon!!
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“I believe empathy is the most essential quality of civilization.” – Roger Ebert
An interesting study in the field of human nature suggests that humans are soft wired to experience another’s plight as we are experiencing it ourselves. Empathy has its roots deeper in human nature. Mirror neurons, as the scientists call it are behind the chemistry that is needed to experience what others are going through. Mirror neurons make you go through the same feeling as others just by seeing them. Empathy is a human reaction which arises after having an illusion of being in the same situation as you see the other person. Being civilized, it is utmost important for you to stand in someone else’s shoes before being judgmental.
“Empathy is about standing in someone else’s shoes, feeling with his or her heart, seeing with his or her eyes. Not only is empathy hard to outsource and automate, but it makes the world a better place.” Daniel H. Pink
Empathy is being able to feel what others are feeling. While working with customers, peers, boss, one has to develop empathetic skills by respecting their work. Through this you can advance social progress, because empathizing is more like the process of connecting. Empathy essentially means understanding people, animal or the natural surroundings thus making the world a better place.
We, the civilized people do not bother while hurting others. We never revisit the agony which is caused to other people by us. If the same harm is done to us we behave quite differently. This deficit in empathy can be called as self absorption. In order to change your perception about the reaction to different situation others are in, you need to expand your consciousness. Thus, walking the spiritual path in other person’s shoes refraining from passing a judgment. Treading this path, you can easily feel other’s pain as if its your own.
“Empathy is really the opposite of spiritual meanness. It’s the capacity to understand that every war is both won and lost. And that someone else’s pain is as meaningful as your own.” – Barbara Kingsolver
“Movies that encourage empathy are more effective than those that objectify problems.” – Roger Ebert
Media has profound effect on civilized mind. It is one of the powerful tool which can create revolution. When mirror neurons in humans can create exactly same effect as other person, visualizing an actor crying triggers crying response from the audience. In order to create a generation which is empathetic, it is important to create media which encourages empathy instead of objectification of the problem. Here, bringing out the humane side of the problem is necessary.
“If you find yourself saying ‘But I’m just being honest’, chances are you’ve just been unkind. Honesty doesn’t heal. Empathy does.”- Dan Waldschmidt
As per one famous Sufi saying it is necessary to let the words which you want to speak pass through three gates. The first one would ask whether those words are true? The second would ask are those words necessary to be spoken and the third gate would ask are those words kind?
The words by now would have already become empathetic. Honesty is a good trait to have but while being honest, you cannot lose kindness.
“Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?” – Henry David Thoreau
Religion, Institutions, Nationalism are just reasons for not being empathetic. The fellow human beings, the creatures and the surroundings have one thing in common, their connection with each other. An instance of looking into each other’s eyes and understanding the pain, can be a miracle. It is mainly because that would invoke the natural connection which you have with the fellow human being.
Judging is easy, but understanding other person’s perspective requires a painstaking effort. We must understand before we judge.
Once your spirituality takes you to the level of understanding other person’s point of view, you are practicing empathy.
“Have compassion and empathy in your heart. Many people are suffering deep emotional anguish beneath the surface of their lives, and smile even as they hurt inside”. – Jim Palmer
Compassion and empathy are at the center stage of a happy life. Deep emotional anguish can be devastating but it’s the compassion which would bring the lives together. Words can hurt but the actions showing empathy would heal anyone’s life who is deeply suffering emotionally.
“Traits like humility, courage, and empathy are easily overlooked – but it’s immensely important to find them in your closest relationships.” – Laura Linney
Relationships are very difficult to handle when there is no humility, courage or empathy left in them. In the world where human beings are just a part of some superficial race to earn money, these important traits have been overlooked. When relationships go beyond repair, instead of identifying the underlying problems, empathy, humility and courage would help a great deal in healing it.
I have a great deal of empathy for anyone who is having a hard time. I believe this ability to see another’s view point has served me well as a writer – Alex Flinn
What is that you would offer when you see a person suffer emotionally? The best thing to be offered is your empathy. Seeing the world from his viewpoint and understanding his emotional state would be the most appropriate thing to be done at that point. It would help you as a person. It would give you immense satisfaction as you have understood a fellow human being, made a connection with him without judging him. This particular act of empathy would take you a different level, it would make you more HUMANE.
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Speech is, perhaps, one of the most important aspects of communication, today. Speech comprises the words that you speak and more importantly how you speak these words. Speech is not taught in schools and colleges. We just pick it up – from our parents, teachers, friends and others in the society with whom we interact. Some of the mistakes that people make in our circle are also adopted by us, though unknowingly. When we set out to improve, we have to unlearn many things. Just because we have been committing these mistakes again and again these form a part of our speech habits. Speech blemishes can be corrected with knowledgeable guidance and a lot of practice. In this regard let’s deal with the following six items:
- Knowledge of language grammar.
- Your vocabulary in that language.
- How you construct your sentences.
- Clarity in your voice.
- Your knowledge and ability to pronounce the words correctly and clearly.
- Pace, pause and tone of your speech.
Knowledge of grammar Normally, it is assumed that knowledge of grammar is only bookish ability and it’s useful only for written communications. This is a fallacy and totally incorrect. You can make nice sentences easy to understand only if you are adequately comfortable in the grammar of the language.
Learning or building of vocabulary is a lifelong process. It should never cease. Difficult, fancy or fashionable words need not be a part of your vocabulary. In fact, simple is beautiful.
Your construction of sentences, in a way, defines your speech. The efficacy of your speech depends on it. Short sentences of varying length may be intertwined to bring out a beautiful style.
Voice plays a major role in your speech. Voice need to be pleasing to the ears of your listeners. Voice can be made very attractive by proper breathing and desirable use of the speech organs.
Pronouncing the words correctly and clearly shows your style. Importance of clear and correct pronunciation should never be undermined.
How you speak is as important in conversation and speech as the content and language, if not more. Power of your speech depends on the judicious use of changing pace, pause and tone etc.
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